I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
