Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
