You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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