UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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