How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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