How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize