Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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