I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
he fucked my hip out of place.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
