You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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