The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
