Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
