I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Just high enough for therapy.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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