I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
