No awkward lesbian experiences without me
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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