maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
