I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
