I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
