Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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