Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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