My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
a search helicopter?!
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
