Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
