Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
