I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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