You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I have aggressive nipples.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
