dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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