Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
