Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
