It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
