The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
