and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize