I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
