the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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