yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
May the power of my ass compel you!!
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
