I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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