Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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