I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
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