NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
