Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
