you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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