Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
