Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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