Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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