I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
