can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Drunk is a universal language darling
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
