I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
