Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
someone owes me an orgasm
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
