I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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