where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
