I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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