so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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